Preparation to Haiti

It seems in life everyone experiences moments that cause complete confusion where we begin to ponder and ask quesitons only God can answer no matter the era we were born we experince moments that completly shock the nation and whatever we were doing tends to freeze in time and in memory, moments that we will never forget, moments where people are engaged to take a closer examination into the time they have left and what they are filling it with. People begin to look deeper into their own lives and start to pick and choose what is important to them and what they want to get rid of such as their values, goals, careers, and the people they surround themselves with. During these moments people tend to sort through their lives and in the midst of it search for what brings them comfort, safety, and joy. Most tend to find that in God. We are natrually brought closer to Him and others around us in times of fear. I remember September 11, 2001, just saying the date and everyone knows what I am talking about. I was a sophmore in high school and at that time in U.S. History class. I was so ditached I couldnt cry but yet so envolved it comsumed my life during the next few weeks and changed it forever expecially when the war took the life of a good friend. I couldnt believe that the same exact second I was sitting in class the world around me seemed to be falling apart and thousands were suffering. However as these moments pass and tend to fade so does our examination into what really matters to us in our lives and we begin to let our guard down and we start to fill our lives back up with the "Junk" we had just cleaned out and got rid of and we again forget the values of one another. But what makes these moments so different than the rest of the tragedies I witness on the news and in the paper everyday? People did not have the same reaction when they read todays top headline "Wrong-Way crash kills 4 on Kansas Turnpike" They wont remember this headline or what they were doing a year from now when they read it in the paper so what makes one life more important than another just because they are surrounded by thousands of others? Its like we have to have a major tragedy to get our attention, we are so immuned to the everyday deaths. Yes the bigger tragidies remind us that we are not promised tomorrow but why do we live like "Tomorrows another day". January 12, 2010 is another reminder of the tragedy that struck millions. Over 250,000 killed and death did not skip a generation. Death does not discriminate or show mercy to your age or religion, sex, or race. And on this Tuesday in Haiti it touched every life whether death hit them directly or indirectly. I was anxious to do everything I could to get to Haiti to help, I wrote to several organizations and am currently getting closer from knowing these people from just being numbers into them being names. I have a week before my depature and my eagarness to go has turned into fear. My desire has turned into selfish thoughts, I work 2 jobs, will go days without sleep and for 2 weeks of my only vacation time this year I am putting myself into an even more tiring situation, my thoughts are selfish in wanting to just stay home and relax. But as I am packing for Haiti and read an email from the director of my organization that sadly describes what living in the streets has been like..." It is raining tonight and I am in my tent. I am thinking about the story Tali relayed to us about what it is like to sleep in the street at her in-laws. The road has to be blocked off. No one can go to sleep because they have to wait for the traffic to be finished. Then it rained so they stood under a tarp for two hours waiting for the rain to stop. They swept the street as dry as they could, put down rugs or whatever they had. The whole street was covered with people side by side and head to toe. Once they laid down, Tali realized that next to her head was the sewer that ran in the open, full of trash and fecel matter. Most people, including underage children, drink alcohol to fall asleep. But once you finally fall asleep, you only have a few hours until you need to get up because the traffic starts again." and I look at how we prep our dead with the finest clothes, put the nicest make up on them, and fix their hair so they are looking their very best and as I see pictures of the dead piled up in Haiti I am reminded how our lifeless bodies without the Holy Spirit is just as useless as the trash piled up along the streets. As I see a photo of a child killed by the tragic earthquake I come to the realization that I did absolutly nothing that kept me from being that child. God showed me mercy and I have the responsiblity to help those in need. I am a servant of Christ. One of my favorite quotes states "Lord help me to great things as though they were little, since I do them with your power, and little things as though they were great, since I do them in your name." This is my prayer.